Saturday, November 26, 2011

Poem you took the thoughts right outta my head!


Listen, I don’t know where you are.

But I haven’t met you yet.

I miss you.

Sometimes, I just wonder what you’re doing at this exact moment.
Where are you?

I’m sorry that I thought you were someone else.
I was blinded a bit.

You deserve my love the most.

Have I ever passed by you?
Maybe I have. Maybe I haven’t.
Maybe I already know you,
but haven’t paid enough attention to.

I wonder if you think about me
Although you possibly haven’t met me either yet,
I already love you.

I do.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Its not the destination its the Journey

For a week now I was trying to go to Portland to see this guy I thought I was in love with. He was there over Thanksgiving and I thought I would go and see him and know for sure. Well last night I found a ride that was leaving this morning (a bit last minute) but I was stoked. The more I started to plan though the less and less I was excited to go.

Well as plans started to be made, the house I was staying out turns out they were coming here and I could stay there but I would be alone. I didn't hear from any other friends (including this guy) so I was invited to Thanksgiving with a friend and that was her only day off and I could only hope that I would see this guy for like what an hour?

The big question became would it be worth it to be alone for 5 days to spend and hour with him. I started to think no.

in fact it started to become the guy I was getting a ride from (we go to church together but we never talk) was the only one excited that I was going so he would have company in the car. It also begain to seem like that was the only thing I was excited for and while sure that would be fun I don't think the five days alone would be worth that.

I guess now I can just hope that since "hey we are actully in the same town" we can hang out once he gets back, maybe I'll bake him something to say thanks. atleast now that is what I can hope for!

While I might feel like I gave up this chance I don't really. I think now I can finally move on, stop liking a guy I have been stuck on for 14 years. Because when I really look at it I want someone who seems to care and make just as much and effort for me as I do for them!

I am also dog sitting so I got to thinking if you are a person looking for love and it just hasn't come yet just get a dog they love you unconditionally!

I have big plans now to cuddle with dogs in bed while watching movies, sipping tea, and reading books!

I will spend Thanksgiving with people I know "Want" to spend time with me! I will wake up and watch the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade my favorite Thanksgiving Tradition.

I will do my nails and make myself pretty and know that now maybe that I have stopped holding onto something for so long I can now move forward to that person that I will be spending my Thanksgivings with!

Friday, August 5, 2011

The tale of an awkward dinner


When I flew home a friend picked me up, she was an hour late and my last flight was the last to come in, sitting alone at the burbank airport waiting for my friend is no fun.

Her sister was with her and we decided to grab food at this diner that used to be my favorite (not so much anymore) anyways friend and her sister spent the whole time talking about inside jokes only they got (I get it I am that way with my brother, only I would try not to be that way if someone else was there) anyhow there was this table filled with Curly haired Hipster guys, they jokenly said that I should Marry one and have a cracked out version of a crazy Red headed Hermonie. Funny that is sort of what i want. Jokes aside.


I have had a thing for guys with Curly hair since middle school! and I kinda hope that I will have curly headed kids running around.

The two of them ploted out my life laughing while I quietly ate my grilled Cheese thinking if only what you say will come true

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Blue Valentine

I rented it last night.


yes it was sad and that is why a lot of people hated it. In a lot of ways that is what I found amazing about it. The thing is in life we don't always get happy endings so I like that not all movies have that.

watching Ryan with the little girl was my favorite!


No matter what one thinks of the film it was wonderfully made and the actors were amazing!!


Sunday, May 1, 2011


So I signed up on a online dating site. I met a guy he lives in New Jersey. Well we have a lot in common and the conversation flows well.

The other night I got bored and thought I should try and find him on facebook which didn't work so then I went to myspace and found a ton of pictures (something he is lacking on the dating site) the first thing I thought was he is so not the type I go for! Then I hated myself for judging him based on looks but I also think that while this isn't something you should do I also think there needs to be attacted to a guy, and granted this in pictures but it leads me to wonder, am I to picky?


I have this picture in my head of the type of guy that I want to be with I think. I wonder if its getting in the way?

I mean and I wouldn't say I go for super attractive guys I have thought people were beautiful while my friends are like "what do you see in him"


Look wise I would say the guys I've liked have all been different its their personality that is somewhat the same. But maybe this is where I've been going wrong finding myself liking guys that would never like me back!


Is my dream guy out there somewhere? With the entire package.......


I like to think that when I meet the one that I will be willing to overlook the things that may not exactly fit because I'll just know.


What is considered Settling? If I ended up dating this guy not finding him attractive did I just settle for him or is that how it really workds?


Or what if what you find attractive is "out of your reach" is everything going to be like you just Settled?


Its so confusing?


My brother and I got into an argument over the summer. He is attracted to Asian girls and I said well "what if you fall in love with someone not asian?" and he said he won't because you get to choose your own path in life. While I tend to believe that you don't get to choose who you fall in love with?


So who's right and who's wrong there?


I mean I look back on my life and think I wouldn't have choosen to fall for the guy that lived across the country.

Or the guy that was never going to love me back.

Or the guy that was going to break my heart on my 21st birthday.

Or the guy that was taken.

I wouldn't fall for a friend that I know for sure I am not his type.

So if I can choose why don't I choose to be with the guy that likes me back?


and is it wrong to go about thinking "Oh fates got this, he'll come along someday"


and if you never find love is it on you or is it fate?

What do you think played in your guys finding the loves that you have?!?!?!

Saturday, April 30, 2011

*Sniff Sniff*


I may of just cried watching the office. You'll be missed!

Summer Lovin

Summer weather has hit So-cal and I am lovin it and it has me dreaming of all the things I want to wear and do this summer! Like remember how I mentioned that I tend to hate fashion trends before I like them. Well I used to hate Jumpers! Now I'm thinking I need one!


I'm not a big fan of Florals either but I am thinking I need something floral and pretty!


I want short flowing dresses, shoes you slip on, and a straw hat to toss on my head.


I want colorful sun glasses. Scarfs to tie on my head. Lots of Ice cream to eat! Plenty of time spent outside!


I want to spend time outside. I want adventures. I want lots of bracelets. Pretty Nail Polish.


I want to create some art while awesome music plays and the breeze blows through my window.


lots of music and times with friends

Nothing is impossible


Kate suffered bullying. Kate had a picture of Prince William hanging on the wall of her room, like several other girls. Kate had a dream to marry him, as did several other girls. The percentage of enrollment at the University St Andrews that year grew 44%, and 9 out of 10 students were women. It was “impossible“to draw the attention of the prince in the middle of that crowd, it was “impossible“to have a chance with him at all, they were all plebeian. But Kate didn’t stop believing … and today, when she climbed into the church, it was he who was waiting.

And today I learned that no matter. Whether it’s the one guy who makes your heart race or the prince of England. What matters is that nothing is impossible. No matter who get in the way, what’s yours is yours and you will arrive at the right time.

Life always has something in store for you!

Friday, April 29, 2011

Wedding Fever!

I have yet to watch the full on wedding *gasp* I know but I am kinda a Grandma that goes to bed at 10. Also the only way I was going to stay up from Midnight till 5am was with a lot of candy and well I had none so.......its replying again at 2 this afternoon so I'll watch it then!

I did watch all the re-caps this morning!

I am slightly obsessed with weddings as is. I was actually going through wedding stuff yesterday afternoon to find wedding pictures of Grooms in Suspenders for a friend because we were talking about that. Here are some of the things I found that I loved!


I am not a fan of butterflies, like I really don't like them but I think the ones in this engagement photo are lovely. I also just love this photo, and I would wear that dress to get married in!


I found this dress and kinda fell in love.

I was even watching Tori Spelling new show where she plans weddings.

Well and of course we have the big event


I am so happy for them and when he whispered "you look beautiful" *sigh*



I loved Kate's dress and I'm not even a big fan of lace!

I have some crumpets in the fridge and I am thinking about eating crumpets and having tea while I watch the big event. We have a mug from when Diana and Charles got married (I have no idea which one of my roommates owns this one) it got me thinking I wonder if we will now have a will and kate one, and might I say if we do atleast I like it a lot more.


Thursday, April 28, 2011

wonderful weather


The weather here in L.A. has been wonderful and I love the days I grab lunch with my friend Karin outside and we sip drinks and chat about the world. I love summer days.


I need a chair in my front yard so I can lounge outside reading all day!